Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Sunday, Monday, Tuesday...

Elections were on Sunday, confusion was on Monday, I spoke with Yvka today, results are due December 5th.

Around 50 of the over 1,000 election posts pulsed with tension, Jean Rabel being one of them. The cholera, the corruption, the lack of infrastructure intensified by the earthquake all lead to leaning on some leaning on pure faith for betterment.

Part of Kay Pov’s roof flew away with Thomas, but they are eating each day and Yvka and the other ladies continue tending to them. Dr. Geralda took samples to test all of them for Cholera and Malaria last Wednesday. I fell into Mami’s arms after hearing that our loved ones in Kay Pov eat daily, I sobbed and sobbed humbled to be used as an instrument and without words to express my gratitude for being used.

On Sunday I went to mass. As I listened to the readings I imagined the different groups in Akadyen and Kolet acting out the gospel. The merging of the two worlds, the air conditioned vast church with fluffy kneelers contrasting with the four incomplete and crumbling walls and dirt floor with chickens occasionally joining us, seemed more eloquent than I could possibly imagine. I lifted my head and saw a lady who has been following the blog (like you) and keeping me and all those in Haiti in her prayers. She was in Haiti with me the way Yvka, Fabio, Rose, and Sylvani are with me here. Feeling my heart at rest I allowed the tears to flow. I felt Papi’s hand rub my back and sat back to lean into his chest and while I lay there soothing myself by the beat of his heart and the waves of his breathing I felt myself in the arms of Walter months back. I am grateful. My soul feels a deep peace and deep happiness, not in a pompous or grandiose way, but in a humble and silent way. I am at home, not because of my physical location, but because of my soul. I feel myself in the arms of Home, of Love, no matter where my feet stand. What a gift. What a humbling gift.

I handed over the elections with faith, delighted in hearing Yvka’s laughter again, and am surrendered to the present.

With you,
Luisely

written on November 30, 2010

2 comments:

  1. Luisely, I just read this quote and you came to mind. May you find blessing in it.

    "We are free in the exact proportion to our capacity for loving beings and things on which we are dependent. The extent of our freedom is identical with the extent of our capacity for communion...the saint, who can love everything, feels free everywhere and in all circumstances; those who are incapable of affection and sympathy, who are incapable of being united with other beings, find slavery everywhere."

    ReplyDelete
  2. I feel so blessed to know you, to have been to Kay Pov and to read this entry. This morning I am reading Henri Nouwen, "Ministry takes courage to be with the sick, the dying and the poor in their weakness and in our powerlessness. We can't fix their problems or even answer their questions. We dare to be with otheres in mutual vulnerability and ministry precisely because God is a God who suffers us and calls us to gratitude and compassion in the midst of pain." This reminds me of you.

    ReplyDelete